D?

Seeing as I will be this size for the next 5 months as I wait for my next surgery and the fact that the kids are in a wedding next weekend, I figured I should probably get a real bra (as opposed to the thin cami bras that I have been wearing). Since I will only be this size for 5 more months, I didn't want to spend much money so headed to Penneys with my 10$ off coupon. They recommend you don't wear and underwire with expanders in since you still have numbness and may not feel if it was digging in. Well trying to find a non-underwire bra in the right size at Penneys was difficult! So I settled on the wrong size but its good enough! 34C is what I ended up with, 32D is what I needed. Apparently they don't carry many 32s and not many 34Ds either! So 34C it is for now, doesn't fit great but it was cheap and will meet my needs for the next 5 months. I am guessing when I am done with all of this I'll be a 32 small C depending on what style/brand of bras.

And when I am done, I'll be buying a whole new bra wardrobe! It is kind of exciting to know that I will be able to wear cute bras which I never have been able to wear before!

Almost a month!

Well its been almost a month since my final fill (and my last post)! So where am I at now... Well, I've got approximately 5 months until surgery number 2, I'm having zero pain, no issues, and really not thinking about any of this much at all.

We have been super busy lately with kid stuff, birthday parties, wedding stuff (sister in law is getting married and both kids are in the wedding), getting ready for winter, painting the living/dining/kitchen... just busy! Which is good at the moment as winter is approaching and things will calm down as we retreat into the warmth of the house and avoid the bitter cold.

I can pretty much do anything now. My range of motion is basically fully back minus the ability to hang from my arms like on monkey bars or anything... not that I have a big need to be doing that but attempted a few times at the park and its so not happening. Otherwise, life is good.

It does all seem a little surreal. Three surgeries on one day which took a bunch of my insides out... After thinking about all of the surgeries that I have had in my life, it all just seems normal to me. A weird surreal normal. I've had near half my pelvic bone taken out and donor bone put in, a chunk taken out of my left lung, a revision to the donor bone graft, half my colon removed, numerous central lines placed and taken out, numerous bone marrow biopsies, and now my ovaries, tubes, uterus, and mastectomy with expanders....And I'm sure I am missing some other random surgery. For me, missing parts is just part of life! So far I really haven't missed anything that I am missing. Life is far to important than to waste time worrying about losing parts and instead focus on staying healthy, living life, enjoying every day, loving my kids and cherishing the moments that matter.

And so I will be enjoying the winter months, I can't complain so far we haven't had gigantor snow storm yet so already winter is off to a good start! Before I know it, spring will be here and I will be preparing for my next surgery which will be nice to put this chapter behind me and move on... healthier.. happier... and not worried about when cancer may occure but instead focused on the future, the kids, and living life.